Detox Your Life, Stay Away from Negative People! 远离负能量的人!

赖彩云 Jessy Lai Chai Yun-nagative

Detox Your Life, Stay Away from Negative People!

The author Michael Bassey Johnson has a great quote: “You don’t buy all the clothes in the market. You choose slowly and carefully, asking the prices for each before buying. The same way you choose your friends, by looking into their lives carefully, before taking any as a companion, then dropping those that are not relevant.”

I love this quote. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness, and all of us have a duty to stay away from people or things that drag us down in life. After all, great people don’t get to where they are by surrounding themselves with negativity or toxic personalities.

But how do we do it? Here are some tips that I think would help!

1.Stay away from people who whines and complains

Let me ask you this: Does whining or complaining about any given situation actually do anyone any good?

I’m not talking about constructive criticism or learning from our mistakes. I’m talking about the kind of whining and self-pity that does absolutely nothing except creating negativity.

When the air-conditioning is faulty in the office and you are waiting for the repairmen to come, will anything be gained by complaining about how warm it is? If your boss or employee is being unreasonable or make mistakes, would it help to whine about it all day every day?

I believe in this: if it is something that you can change, then you bear the duty to make things better, so don’t complain. If it is something that you can’t change, then whining only spreads negativity and make people around you feel even more horrible, so don’t complain.

2. Don’t feed the negativity of others

OK, but what if these people who whine or complain are people that are really close to us? What if they are our spouses, best friends or family members? Surely we should not just abandon them like that?

You’re right. Sometimes it is not practical to cut ties with everyone who are negative, especially if those people mean a lot to you. What should you do then?

What I have learned over time is that I should not feed their negativity. When friends and family come to us with their issues or problems, try not to affirm their “victim” identities or agree with how pathetic their lives are. Instead, try to be that calming, reassuring and encouraging presence. Show them what they can do. Tell them that they have the ability to make things better, and be there for them giving emotional support. That way, you become a real asset to everyone around you.

3. Be careful not to get arrogant

Once you have learned to shut out or negate negativity, it becomes easy for us to think that we are “better” than others. Sometimes by choosing to be cold to people who are sad, we become distant and unkind. We even risk feeling “enlightened”, as if you are so above everyone else in your workplace, your family or your society.

Here’s a clue: get a grip on yourself! You are no better, nor any worse than any of those people. Those people are neither better, nor any worse than you.

The only difference between the “positive” you and the people who practice negativity is that you see things from a different point of view than they do. Realise that you are just lucky enough to be living in an environment that encourages positivity, or maybe your life just makes it easier for you to stay positive. Realise that not everyone have that privilege.

By running around life with an attitude that you are somehow better than other people, all you will do is serve to alienate most of the people around you.

In summary, maintaining a positive attitude is a fine art that requires discipline and a lot of care. It might not be easy, especially if your life is tough. But once you have mastered it, you will realise the power of the mind. Nothing might change in your life, but you start feeling happier and more at peace.

为你的人生“排毒”,远离负能量的人!

作家Micheal Bassey Johnson有一句非常有名的名言:”在逛市场时,千万不要第一时间就买完市场上所有的衣服,而是必须慢慢以及小心的选择.在还未决定要买哪一件衣服前,你必须比较每一件衣服的价钱。同样的,你必须选择捏朋友必须先审核他们的性格,将正能量的人视为良伴,那些负能量的人就算了吧!”

我很喜欢这这一句名言。

每个人都对自己让自己快乐的责任,要让自己快乐很简单,那就是尽量远离那些充满负面能量的人事物。成功的人身边很少围绕着拥有负面情绪的人,因为他们不想被这写负能量给影响。

1.远离那些不断抱怨以及投诉的人。

然后我来问你一个简单的问题:你认为不断抱怨或投诉能改善事情吗?

我现在所说的抱怨不是指那些有建设性的意见或从错误中学习的意见,而是那些自怜自艾的话,而这些抱怨除了带来负能量之外,对事情毫无帮助。

例如办公司的空调发生故障需要维修人员前来维修,若你还在一旁不断抱怨很热,那也于事无补/又或者你的老板或同事是不讲理的人或是犯错了,你每分每秒都在抱怨,请问对你自己或对事情有什么帮助吗?

. 我一直都坚信,若事情有转弯的余地,那就请你去竭尽所能得将事情变得更好,反之,事情已经到了无法改变的状况,我们能做的就只是接受,别再抱怨了,因为你只会制造恐慌!

2.若悲观者是我们的至亲,该怎么办?

若这些爱抱怨的人是我们最亲近的人,例如另一半\好友或是家人,我们该怎么做?因为我们不可能做到置之不理!

有时候,我们跟某些负面性格的人很难切割,尤其这些人当中某些人是你的至亲,那我们又该怎么做呢?
对以这样情况,我可谓相当有经验,而我自己的做法是永远都不要迎合这些人的负面的情绪或是言论,相反的,你必须持之以恒的灌输他们正面的想法,鼓励他们注重眼前事,别再想一些有的没的.

不断的鼓励他们,他们拥有将事情做得更好的能力,给予他们温馨的支持,成为他们最强的后盾.

3.请别自大!

而一些能力较强或是心智能力强大的人,容易出现”我比别人更优秀”的想法,他们会对身边处于悲观情绪的朋友很冷漠甚至有距离感.

但我想告诉你的是,你并没有比那些负面的人优秀或是比他们差,正如这这些有情绪问题的朋友也一样,他们虽不会很优秀,但也不会比你差!请注意,别太自大!

你只是比他们幸运,生长在一个相对比较乐观与正面的环境,又或者你的生活条件较好得以让你保持正面与乐观,导致你看事情角度与他们不一样.但请你记得,鄙视每个人都这么幸运

总的来说,保持正面与乐观不是一件简单的事,你需要严谨的自律以及无限的关怀,尤其你的人生正遭遇困境,保持正面情绪,更是一件难事.

但你一定要想办法将心灵壮大,因为人生是你的,没有谁能真正的帮助你,除了你自己.

请记得,永远保持乐观的话,你将会吸引许多的好运!

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